The Smile That You WoreChapter(s):
2 - Just FineAuthor: xxshamisen Genre:
Angst, Romance, Fluff? Rating:
PG-13 to NC-17 depending on the chapter ^^Warnings:
Pretty clean (except for the language), but full of conversations? =\ Plus really short >>;;Pairing:
Everything written here came from my imagination. Plus I don't own any of the boys
though I wish I did xD
.Summary: It was an unrequited love; everybody knew that, but never made mentioned of it even once. Ever since that fateful day six years ago, Aoi knew Uruha was different from anybody he’d laid his eyes upon. Comments:
Ugh, whipped up at 3 in the morning because I felt really bad for not writing. And it's also very short! Gaah I really feel bad >>;; Promise I'll make it up later, I'll write as soon as I get home from the orphanage~ >_<;;1 - Friday Night
Everything was perfectly fine.
At least, that’s what Aoi convinced himself of. And convincing himself of this was perfectly normal as well – he’d been doing this kind of self-deceit for months and months now. It’s not only because only he himself wants to; he does it for his fans (thinking how everything was always fine made him less angry), for the band (admitting to problems just does not good to the creative process), and because even if everything is the opposite of fine, he just won’t be able to do anything about it. It’s stupid to go against what’s happening anyway, and instead of thinking how miserable everything was at the moment, why not just dismiss the thought and go on with life? He smiled inwardly. That could very well be the recipe for happiness, from the way how that sounded.
But he wasn’t happy. And deceit was still deceit.
“What?” a dumbstruck Aoi asked, puzzled as to why Ruki suddenly slapped him at the back of the head (though only lightly) like that.
“I said, ‘Lying is still lying, right, Aoi?’ RIGHT AOI?” The sudden raise in Ruki’s voice startled the guitarist, unable to do anything but nod compliantly to whatever the small man said. He then shot a questioning look at Reita, who avoided his look and then he knew something was going on between the two of them. Stiffling a laugh, Aoi placed the pitcher of coffee down and headed to the long table. Kai thought it would be lovely if they had a cup of coffee together first before practicing, and of course, whatever the leader says goes else they’d have to stay up late to get lectured about how ‘they don’t have good group dynamics because they don’t spend time together’ and all that crap. And why nobody has spoken against this certain get-together is for the fear of that very lecture.
This was the first time they are doing this, however, with Kai in the end of the table, Ruki and Reita across each other, Aoi and Uruha the same. Everybody set down their coffee cups on the table, quite unsure of how to really work this thing. While the vocalist continued to chant something under his breath (probably about Reita, but nobody really bothered to listen to him), Aoi looked at Kai, asking through his eyes what to do next.
“Ah… eeto…” the drummer started, obviously unnerved by the situation at hand, especially when Uruha and Reita looked uninterested by the whole thing, and Ruki not even paying attention to him. “So guys, how was your weekend? Aoi-san, care to start?” Kai had such a pleading look in his eyes that Aoi didn’t have the nerve to refuse the young man. He sipped on his coffee for a while, praying that when he sets it down on the table again, he’d say something smart, or funny, or just something that would break this unnecessary awkward atmosphere around them.
“Yeah… umm… it was fine I guess… had a walk around the park the other day and bumped into Uruha.”
Surprise was evident on the eldest member’s face when the three – Kai, Ruki, and Reita – lunged forward on the table, all eager eyes on him. Before he was even able to say the words ‘what the hell are you people doing’ or just glance at Uruha to see how he reacted to that, the three bombarded him with so many questions he couldn’t even understand because they were speaking all at once.
“What did he say?” Kai finally chimed, ending their mindless, unintelligible probing with the poor, speechless Aoi.
The sound of a chair being pushed backward suddenly emerged from the background. The four looked around and found the other guitarist refilling his cup, looking not too amused with how idiotic his band mates were acting. “I’m here, you know,” he said rather bleakly, but with that tone that made the three retreat to their seats and behave. Aoi simply stared at his reflection on the dark coffee, eyebrows furrowed not because he found the tone offending (although it did sound so), but because of something else he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Guilt, perhaps?
Reita sighed, sensing the building tension in the room. “Okay, so what did you say?” It was only Reita who could talk like that to the blond guitarist, after all.
Going back to his seat, Uruha simply shrugged at the bassist’s question, matching it with his signature rise and fall of the eyebrows. “Hi?”
“That wasn’t very interesting.” Trust Ruki’s sharp tongue to spurt out a comment as such.
“Well what am I supposed to say then?” Uruha pushed himself off the back of the plastic chair and slightly banged his arm on the table, alarming the others, most especially Aoi. A pause was made before he continued, however, fearing that he might blurt something out. “Besides, it rained like a bitch, so that wasn’t exactly the best time to have a conversation with anybody, now was it?”
“Okay, I think that was a long enough break, let’s go back to work ladies,” Kai piped in as he stood from his chair, setting down his still warm and unfinished drink on the counter. Ruki and Reita followed and the two made their way out of the room first, leaving Kai by the door and the two guitarists still sitting across each other. Uruha exited the room next, coffee cup still at hand though, doing his best to avoid the leader’s puzzled gaze. Finally Aoi stood up, finishing his cup of coffee first before leaving it on the counter with the rest. As he passed by the door, Kai’s gentle hand tapped his shoulder, as the younger man looked at him with so much confusion and concern.
A smile simply rested on the dark-haired guitarist’s lips. “Everything’s fine.”
The band’s day ended with so much awkwardness that Ruki wasn’t even able to continue with his banter towards Reita, in which Aoi was very baffled of, but unable to ask of it due to the said awkwardness. Still it was a rather productive day; with silence filling every inch of the room the vocalist was able to come up with a few nice lyrics and the others able to practice on their own. More or less the day wrapped up pretty nicely, with everybody in good spirits, or at least, appeared to be.
“Hey Uruha!” a voice called from behind, making the tall guitarist look over his shoulder to see who it was. Behind the sunglasses that he wore, his eyes narrowed, wondering what it could be that Aoi wanted from him this time. Needless to say he still felt uneasy and so he continued walking until he got to his car, the older man following him thankfully (or perhaps not really). Only when he fished his keys out of his pocket and clicked on it for the doors to unlock did he turn to look at Aoi, and he wasn’t even really looking at the other man – he was simply facing him, and his eyes were glued on the ground. For some reason he couldn’t look at him in the eye.
“Um, yeah, what.”
Though a warm, friendly smile was on Aoi’s face, Uruha never would’ve seen it with him so fixed on playing with his car keys like that. “You should’ve told me if you didn’t have an umbrella that time, I kinda had an extra umbr–”
“What?” Annoyance and disbelief both were obvious in the younger guitarist’s voice, and as a reflex he straightened up and removed his glasses to look at the other man in the eye, no matter how hard it actually was for him to do so.
Aoi searched into Uruha’s eyes and was very unsuccessful into trying to understand what the latter actually meant with that look. The kind smile turned into a sheepish one as the older guitarist stepped back a little and scratched the back of his head. Uncharacteristic of him as it may be, there really wasn’t much for Aoi to do but exactly that. “Well I just thought you might’ve forg–”
“It was raining, that’s–”
“Bullshit Aoi, that’s not what I’m talking about,” he snarled, pounding on top of his car with an open fist. “I’m asking why the hell you’re so passive about… about this.”
The look on Uruha’s eyes was enough to pierce Aoi’s heart. He most certainly did not understand why there was that intense hurt on the blond’s face… at least, he tried not to understand why it was there in the first place. Aoi shoved his head to the side, avoiding the accusing stare that Uruha was already giving to him. It wasn’t fair. How come this guy gets to be angry, when he was the one taken advantage of in the first place? When he’s just trying to be a good friend? When he’s simply trying to make things the way they are, to make things alright?
As soon as Aoi was about to say something, the taller male already had his back at him, opening the car so begrudgingly. Uruha opened his mouth to speak too but no words came out. Instead he simply entered his car, closed the door and started the engine, then waited for Aoi to get the hell out of his way. Aoi got out of the way of course, turning his back on Uruha as well to head back inside the studio, and the other guitarist went on his way, chanting how everything was not fine.
With the way that the glass door of the studio smashed into pieces as Aoi slammed it so hard after him, everything was most certainly not alright.